”And I know you’re shining down on me from Heaven
Like so many friends we’ve lost along the way
And I know eventually we’ll be together (Together)
One sweet day (and I’ll wait patiently to see you in heaven)”
Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men, ‘One Sweet Day’
When someone dies, it is clearly a sad time. Their friends and family will mourn them, and it will be hard to get over the grief sometimes. Grief is, in fact, an important part of moving on. We need to be able to let our feelings out and feeling sad about losing someone we loved is only natural.
Yet it is just as important to celebrate the life of that person. If we don’t do this, then the last feelings we will have for them will be sad ones that focus on loss rather than happy ones that focus on love. Here are some wonderful ways to celebrate someone’s life once they pass away, which will help you grieve too.
The Funeral
The first thing to consider when it comes to celebrating someone’s life is their funeral. What should it be like? In the past, funerals were somber events where no one quite knew what to say or do. Finding an understanding funeral service will help you. The experts will be able to guide you in how to make the funeral much more of a celebration than anything else.
Remember, the choice of funeral – if it is something unusual – may come as a shock to some of the mourners, so ensure everyone is aware of the kind of funeral service you are intending to hold. It should always be respectful, but if the person you are saying goodbye to wanted people to remember them well, or you feel this is the best option, changing the funeral to be a celebration rather than an event to dread is a great idea.
Plant A Memorial Tree
When the funeral is over, it can be hard to know quite what to do next. Not everyone is going to feel like enjoying food and drink, and the cost of this can be prohibitive, too, so it’s not something that always has to happen. Yet you don’t necessarily want friends and family to feel unsure as to the next step, and you don’t want them to leave without saying a proper goodbye.
This is where a memorial tree can help. You’ll need to get permission to plant a tree on public land, so you may need to do this in your own backyard, but that can sometimes be even better since you’ll always have somewhere to go to remember your loved one. Once you plant the tree, you can invite people to say a few words, or just enjoy some memories. The tree will be a constant reminder of the life you are celebrating.
Arrange For A Beautiful Grave
When we lose someone we care about, our whole world can start to spin. For some of us, it takes a while for the spinning to stop. A person might need a year to get over one loss, but ten years to get over another before they feel ready to move on. Both of these things can happen, but they are different. When our feelings start to spiral out of control, we need a way to snap back to earth. In other words, we need something that will both keep us grounded and give us peace. One way we can do this is by going to see where a loved one is buried.
It’s not everyone’s wish to have a grave, but if there is one, you can work at keeping it looking beautiful and well-maintained. You can have cemetery grave marker vases and a v headstone with meaningful words on it. You can ensure the flowers are always fresh or perhaps add some plants.
If there is no grave, find a spot that reminds you of the deceased loved one and go there when you need to celebrate them. Think of their life, listen to their favorite music, have a picnic – do what you need to do to remember them and enjoy the fact that you got to spend time with them.
Do Something They Wanted To Do
Everyone has dreams about things they’d love to do in their lives. It might be visiting somewhere special in another country, writing a book, or starting a class of some kind. It could be anything at all. If there is something you know your departed loved one always wanted to do, but they never had the chance, why not do it on their behalf?
This can be a beautiful way to celebrate their life, and it will give you a happy, exciting, fulfilling experience to remember them forever
Carry Something Of Theirs With You
If you have an item of clothing or jewelry that belonged to your loved one, wearing it is a simple and touching way to honor them.
You can wear something they gave you, like a hat, necklace, or shirt, to keep their spirit close to you all day long. Alternatively, you might wear their watch all the time or have another of their items with you at all times.
Save Them A Seat
One idea for memorializing the passing of a loved one in a way that is respectful is to continue to assign that person a “seat” at important get-togethers and activities for some time after they have passed away.
It is possible to serve as a reminder of their continued presence in your family by designating a seat at the table during the holiday meal in honor of their memory.
Write Something
Even though our love is always the same, our thoughts, feelings, regrets, and memories can change as time goes on. Writing can be therapeutic and is a good way to work through hard thoughts and feelings and say what’s on your mind.
Put your letter or poem out there, whether it’s in a hidden location or on a grief blog or online forum. You could also keep it in a special place and make reading your old love letters and poems an annual tradition.
Play Their Favorite Song
Music can make us feel a lot of different things and certain songs can make us stop and take us back to special times in our lives.
On the anniversary of their death, listen to their song over a glass of wine while you reminisce, as a special request on a radio show, or as part of a playlist at a party with friends. You might even join in and sing
